25 SIGNS YOU HAVE GROWN UP

[hardywang]

1. Your houseplants are alive, and you can't smoke any of them.
2. Having sex in a single bed is out of the question.
3. You keep more food than beer in the fridge.
4. 6:00 am is when you get up, not when you go to bed.
5. You hear your favourite song in an elevator.
6. You watch the Weather Channel.
7. Your friends marry and divorce instead of "hook up" and "break up".
8. You go from 130 days of holidays to 20.
9. Jeans and a sweater no longer qualify as "dressed up."
10. You're the one calling the police because those %&@# kids next door won't turn down the stereo.
11. Older relatives feel comfortable telling sex jokes around you.
12. Your car insurance goes down and your car payments go up.
13. You feed your dog Science Diet instead of McDonald's leftovers.
14. Sleeping on the couch makes your back hurt.
15. You take afternoon naps from noon to 6 pm.
16. Dinner and a movie is the whole date instead of the beginning of one.
17. Eating a basket of chicken wings at 3 am would severely upset, rather
    than settle, your stomach.
18. If you're a woman, you go to the pharmacy for ibuprofen and
    antacid, not condoms and pregnancy tests.
19. A $4.00 bottle of wine is no longer "pretty good stuff."
20. You actually eat breakfast food at breakfast time.
21. "I just can't drink the way I used to" replaces "I'm never going to
    drink that much again."
22. 90% of the time you spend in front of a computer is for real work.
23. You drink at home to save money before going to a bar.
24. You read this entire list looking desperately for one sign that doesn't apply to you and can't find one to save your sorry old butt.

BONUS: When you find out your friend is pregnant you congratulate
them instead of asking "Oh s*$# - what happened?